Entry Twenty-Three: If you vote for one party, you’re a bad person. If you vote for my party, you’re a good person.

I really hate talking about politics. I really do, but as of late, I’ve been seeing a lot of people saying one thing and it’s making my head spin around in circles. It’s also getting to the point that my family is also becoming divided as well. Now I’m going to give some of my thoughts as well as some opinions I do have on this as well. So here we go as I prepare to get stuff thrown at me.


We all know who is in the office and that happens to be Donald Trump. Anyone that knows me that I cannot stand him at all and I personally believe he shouldn’t be president. I also feel like some of the statistics were a slap in the face when the election happen because it was said that the ones that voted for Trump were uneducated and the ones that voted for Clinton were educated. First off, I’m educated. Second off, I’m a female and thirdly, I did not vote for either party. I voted for Gary Johnson because you want to know why?


It was my right to vote for whoever I felt like voting for.


Now prior towards the elections, it was the primaries and Pennsylvania had their voting day. I couldn’t jump out side of my party which was at the time Republican and had to vote in there.  I was sure I didn’t want to vote for Trump because he was not fit for president. I went with the lesser of the evil and picked Ted Cruz. Obviously that was not meant to be as Trump was the winner of my state.


However, I don’t want to talk about what I did and so forth despite me dropping a few things here and there. Prior towards a shit storm of stuff that happened in 2016, nobody was at each other’s throats and Obama was in office. When Obama was in office, it was at peace until the middle of 2015 where Donald Trump declared he was going to be in office and doing some hateful stuff. That’s when everyone was going at each other’s throats and started to label people as bad. Hell, it was beginning to come worse in 2016 where people were attacking one another for political parties that got my head spinning in circles and eventually, it reached a peak last year when racism and so forth was becoming a major issue here.


Everyone started to label who voted a Republican a racist and believed that democrats were the best party because they had everything. Democrats believed in peace and love while Republicans believed in chaos and violence. I don’t want to get into stuff because I will talk. However, at the time when I voted Republican and when same sex marriage was announced in 2015, I was happy because people it was about time that all people could marry and when the shootings happened in Orlando one year later, I was very upset and crying for days because there was so much hate in the world and you couldn’t even go to a party and have fun. That’s how upset I was for days.

There were some things I didn’t agree on with Obama as well because he was doing stuff with Obamacare and I was afraid that I was not going to be able to afford Medical care for myself and kept on holding it off. I was also mad that he was promising more jobs, but I felt like that was a false hope. Thankfully, I did get a job during his run as president and thankfully, I did get heathcare, but let me ask you this. Does that make me prejudice because I didn’t like what he was doing? No it doesn’t and if you want to know, there was some good stuff he did that I liked such as him killing Osama Bin Laden and me having a party when that cockroach was killed. Hell, I stayed up to 1AM celebrating him being dead.


Now here comes the part where I want to talk about and that was switching my party. When my ID card had to get renewed, they always ask you what is your political party and I picked the option that said “independent” because I was sick and tired of people labeling others. I did get positive feedback on my change who were supportive, but when I got home, I found my “Women for McCain” pin in the cabin because I had to find something for my mom. I took a train of thought and asked everyone was I a bad person for voting for Senator McCain back in 2008, which was my first election and I was told “No, I wasn’t”.


Bottom line is this: People are going to vote for whoever, but if you vote Republican, you shouldn’t be labeled as a “bad person”. You can be one that doesn’t agree with views. The same goes for the Democratic Party as well. You could be a bad person yourself. Nobody and I mean nobody should be saying you’re wrong and I’m right because my views are awesome. We should respect it and that’s it.


Also, I do want to give a message to my family members on both sides. Politics make the worse come out of us regardless of what party you vote in and if you want to come to my wedding, do not and I mean, do NOT talk politics because I will personal boot you out of my own wedding.


That is all I want to say about that.


Thanks for reading and Go Patriots.



By themeagang

Entry Twenty-Two: Baseball. Does it really need Villains and Heroes?

*Disclaimer* this newest entry isn’t biased or intended to be mean. It’s about an opinion I have regarding something that was said that really makes me want to shake my head and throw up hands up in the air and question this person why he thinks that. Please be advised, this blog maybe GIF worthy and shady at the same time.


A little before I went to work today, I did my normal routine of checking my social media to check and see what was being said and what I missed while I was sleeping and catching some sleep. I decided to look and then I saw something that made me shake my head and roll my eyes. Here is the subject that I saw that made me do such a thing.





To quote the Miz from the WWE. “Really?” “Really?”


Of course, I’m blocked on my personal page and I actually sub quoted the tweet and said since when did Vince McMahon buy out baseball and become his company? (I since then deleted the tweet). Then I went to Rhett Bollinger, who I always keep in contact with because he is my go-to person when I asked about The Twins, The Yankees or just tell him about my cats and wrestling or just saying hello to him and said this.





Obviously, that would be favorite on twitter, but it had me wondering about something. Does Baseball really need heroes and villains?


It’s funny how the New York Yankees have were mentioned in that tweet because I can think of many people on that team that had the best personalities like Derek Jeter, Andy Pettitte, Bernie Williams, Jorge Posada, and Mariano Rivera, but they weren’t labeled Heroes or Villains. Other cities such as Boston, Philadelphia, Seattle, and other towns that the Yankees played them despised them, but didn’t label those guys I said above heroes or villains. They were just good players and amazing people on the outside.


Sure, some of the Yankees had some players that had bad reputations. That goes for any other team out. Everyone has a good and bad personality, it doesn’t make them either one of them. Hell, for all I know, Phil Hughes could pop up on WWE, play the role as a heel, and he could do an amazing job, but regardless, it’s the personality of the person that plays the character. Going on wrestling again, Triple H, who happens to be one of my favorite wrestlers of all time, plays the role as heel on television, but has a good personality and cares about the future of this business. On top of that, he’s a future hall of famer.


Now onto something that was recent in that tweet and that was the Chicago Cubs. It was their personalities, their comeback and determination that every one of those players had to win the World Series. Not once did I see the Cleveland Indians act like the Kevin Owens Character once and not once did I see The Chicago Cubs act like Seth Rollins during that series. So explain to me why heroes and Villains were needed there or maybe just recently, Did Julian Edelman of the New England Patriots have the character of Dean Ambrose and did Tom Brady had the character of John Cena during Super Bowl 51?


OK let me back up at the last line, maybe Tom Brady did have the five moves of doom and win the Super Bowl. I don’t know he did and for starters, he could be viewed as the Villain in all of Football, but It’s his personality and drive that made him get that Super Bowl Ring for a fifth time.


Bottom line is this: It’s the personality that gets you going that makes you play baseball. If I wanted to see characters of heels or faces, I would either pay 9.99 + tax for WWE Network on watch it on Fios if I wanted to see characters like that. I still watch baseball to root and jeer for who I want, not label someone the heels or faces.
Thanks for Reading.








By themeagang

Entry Twenty One: South Fort Myers High School Scandal: Peer Pressure?

*Disclaimer* This blog is not about me ranting. This is about my thoughts on this whole situation that’s been going on for the past couple days, and I want to take some time and leave my thoughts about some of the situations that happened. Anyone offended by this blog, please exit. That’s the only thing I ask for you to do.

There are times that I don’t even want to blog on situations like this. Hell, this area happens to be a “grey zone” for me because this has actually happened to the party that’s writing this blog, but something about this whole “sex scandal” down in Fort Myers has hit a nerve with me, and it’s making me wonder about a few things on top of that.

Yes, I did say “Sex Scandal” because something like this did happen at a High School. For those of you that may have seen it on the news, you know what happened. For the ones that don’t know, here is a link.


Thanks to one of my cousins, who happen to be an alumnus at this school, I was fully aware on this situation and the only thing I can do was shake my head. Why on earth did a 15 YEAR OLD GIRL have to do something like this? Why on earth did she have to stoop down to this level knowing the consequences? The first one that came into my mind was “Peer Pressure” and reading this article, that did set off some alarms I had in my head.

Peer Pressure seems to be a big issue these days and yes, I happened to go through that stage where everyone around the age of 15 was “moving fast”. I’m going to take you to that grey area and talk about the time where this happened.

November 2005, my freshman year of High School.

Prior to coming to High School, I had a lot of issues with self-esteem, in which by the way, I still deal with it to this day. I wanted to shed the image of me being the girl who didn’t go out with anyone because she kept to herself half the time. During first semester of Freshman Year, I went out with someone. I didn’t tell my mom because at the time, she and I were fighting all the time. The only person I told was my dad and my grandparents, but of course, bad jokes had to go down and it wasn’t even funny what was said.

The relationship was not really a fairy tale princess like one. It was one based on looks where I had to straight my hair, wear make-up, and where certain clothes to make him happy. That was not my type of style, but I had to do it in order to be “cool”. The whole thing was mental abusive and at one point, got psychical where he shoved me into a locker. Again, that’s where the whole “peer pressure” thing came about because I didn’t want to leave him.

There was an off day for school and it was the same weekend, Eddie Guerrero passed away. I was going to my brother’s last football game of the year for Saint Charles. Prior towards that, I was supposed to be hanging out with him. I gave him my house number because at the time, I didn’t have a cell phone (Again, mom didn’t want us to have cell phones due to “Texting” being high at the time). The plan was supposed to be call around a certain time, so I would leave my house and get there. Hours passed, no call, and I made the decision to stay home, which turned out to be the best decision I made because if that phone call was made, god knows what might’ve happened.

Let’s just put it this way, the relationship wasn’t meant to be and I dumped him a couple of days after Thanksgiving and let everyone aware that this boy shouldn’t be in a relationship with anyone because he’s abusive and will judge you to make you something you don’t want to be.

That’s my story, but now back on topic regarding the girl.

Like I said, we don’t know why she would go into a bathroom and do something like this with two dozen boys. We don’t know the issues that go around at home. The parents really need to know what their kids are doing after school as well and REALLY should talk about their children about having sex and what could go down at a young age.

Of course there are going to be ignorant fools out there that are going to assume stuff. There were a couple of statements I had to roll my eyes at such as “I know what career she’s going to have when she gets older”.

The poor girl’s going to have to live with the rest of this through her entire High School Life and into her adult years. We don’t need to assume and with the day in age of social media such as twitter and snapchat where there was a video of this going down, people are going to say stuff about her to make it even worse.

In conclusion of my blog, 16 of the 25 were disciplined for this, but that’s not enough and another thing I question about this whole situation, why didn’t the girl press charges? That’s one question I really want to know, but at the end of the day, I really can’t say much because I don’t know the girl personally to say much more.

Thanks for reading.

By themeagang

Entry Twenty: My liking of a wrestler

I haven’t blogged since March because I’ve been busy a lot and haven’t really had the time to do one. I finally had the time to sit down and think about to write. I hope everyone is ready for this.

The year 2015 been a rollercoaster. From trying to figure out what’s going to happen to my family to looking for a job until I was finally brought back after something going down there a couple of weeks prior to finally getting back on track. The list goes on and on. However, there was one date that will forever be meaningful to me and this date was…

May 15th, 2015.

Why is the date important to me? Why is that I’m only talking about this date? It’s the date I went to see WWE NXT at the Tower Theater this past year, and it took one wrestler to make me like a wrestler again? I will explain further when it comes up because I have a lot of things to say, but first, I’m going to talk about how I was able to secure these tickets.

IF I wasn’t let go after the holidays, I was supposed to save up some money to take a trip to Pittsburgh. Yes, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where I was going to see the Minnesota Twins play against the Pirates and see one of my favorite pitcher, Phil Hughes, possibly pitch one of the games. I was rehired in April and had no time to get these tickets. My paycheck would be two weeks later and that was the first week in May. (I could be off on that one, not sure). While figuring out, I noticed that NXT was in town and it was at a place where I knew where it was. The Tower Theater which is near 69th street in the Shopping District. I was conflicted because the show was on Thursday and had to ask my mom for some help to get these because I wanted to see close up, but because of situations being tight, she couldn’t help.

I was crushed because payday was coming up and my money wouldn’t clear to that Monday. I kept hoping that there would be another day added in order for me to go. After some speculation, another day was finally added and it was the 15th. I was relived and the plans for Pittsburgh were officially off. I decided I was going to NXT.

The weekend was long, hot and going slow because it was the last weekend before the show. I wanted that week to go by quickly so the day would come quickly. Thanks to a call in for work and watching NXT as well, it did and Friday did come. My brother had to get his then girlfriend at the time, who was going with us, but with me. I was getting anxious and wanted to leave early. I just did that and had to make a stop to a store because I was thirsty. Anyways, let’s get to the actual show.

The show itself was amazing. From opening to finish, it was one show that I wouldn’t forget and would talk about it for months on end and annoy people about it. I was glad that I had fun and I was also glad that my brother saw one of his favorite NXT Diva, Bayley on top of that. So it was a win-win situation. However, it was the main event I was intrigued of seeing.

The day before this one, It was Finn Balor vs. Tyler Breeze vs. Kevin Owens in a triple threat match for the NXT Championship, which Owens was holding at the time. Apparently, Kevin Owens did something and it caused Balor to be angry, and when he gets angry, something comes out of him. While reading what was going on, he said that Kevin Owens has to bring his “A” Game because the show I was at….he was bringing the demon.

This made the main event more intriguing to me because I was one of the lucky ones that would see this once in a lifetime chance to see Finn as the Demon. I was able to catch it on video which I will share here.

(Had I not moved my camera in time, I would’ve missed him)

While Finn was making his entrance, I was just amazed at the fact that he was coming to the ring like that. I know this sounds a little bit corny, but I felt like it was love at first sighted at the same time. I was just amazed about this and lost for words watching someone talented and beautiful making this entrance. I enjoyed the match and thought it was cool, especially after where Finn jumped from the railing onto the wrestlers and him getting his revenge on Owens. I loved that part, but in the end, I noticed the show was over.

I wasn’t sad that the show was over or anything. I felt happy again, but over the course of the weeks since I saw Finn, I felt a feeling that I haven’t felt in a long time and that feeling was me crushing over a wrestler. Now the last time that has happened, I was crushing over Jeff Hardy where I would cut his pictures and put them on my wall. Since then, I would go for the baseball players and not care about the wrestlers because most of the time, the obsessed fan girls would ruin it for me and it would take a long time for me to ever liking someone again. Thanks to one person, this feeling came back.

I’m going to put this out there that it wasn’t this show that I became a fan of him. I was a fan of him prior to seeing him live for the first time. I watched his documentary right after the NXT Takeover event where he debuted the paint and noticed how sweet, kind and humble he was. It’s personality that makes someone attractive and I find his personality as well as his cuteness (Yes, I did call him cute) that’s attractive, but at the same time, he’s a damn good wrestler and is NXT Champion for a reason, in which I nearly missed because I was asleep during the Japan show and had not my brother texted me, I would’ve missed the whole thing. Thank god it would be on replay.

I always dream about redoing my prom because to me, it was a disaster. I didn’t have anyone to go with, my hair was messed up, and I didn’t have anyone to dance with those dances. In fact, I wrote a blog about actually redoing my prom to the stuff I wanted to be, but apparently, that didn’t come true, but hey, dreams could come true with me possibly redoing it with Finn this time? Never say Never……

OK, I have to stop right there because it’s getting desperate in a way and I’m being thirsty haha.

In the end, that’s why I’m happy to like a wrestler again. Not because I have a crush on them, but I just found someone I can cheer for. That’s what matters to me and I have to say thank you to Finn for not only impressing me, but giving me the chance to cheer for someone again.

Thanks for Reading

By themeagang

Entry Nineteen: One Direction Fans Meltdown to Zayn leaving/ How I dealt with Geri leaving the Spice Girls.

Yesterday was possibly one of the worst days that I had to be on the Internet out of all places. For some of you that follow the news and so forth, Zayn Malik of the group “One Direction” left leading to every fan girl having a nervous breakdown to the point where it got so bad, there was a hashtag that said “Cut 4 Zayn”. I spoke out towards them and how I don’t like the fact that they have to use a suicidal taunt for attention. I stated on my personal twitter that there are people who suffer from depression and look to suicide by doing something like cutting their wrists. I don’t know why half of these girls think it’s funny to cut themselves and so forth because it’s not.

While seeing the viral meltdowns of Zayn leaving, this brought me back to a situation that happened back in 1998. Some seventeen years ago where most of the One Direction Fans weren’t even around yet. On May 31st, 1998, Geri Halliwell aka Ginger Spice from the group we known today as the Spice Girls, left the group. I remember this clearly because I was in the living room of the house I lived at in the Poconos and it was my dad that broke the news first to me while I was playing. For some of you that may or may not know. I was the biggest Spice Girls Fan. I had the dolls, I had the CDs, I saw and bought the movie. It drove my parent’s nuts that they had to spend the money on stuff like that. Hell, I remember driving my dad nuts because Ginger’s head broke off because my brother slammed the pull out bed, causing her head to break. We nearly went to EVERY STORE to try to find a Ginger Spice doll, but it wasn’t successful. I was upset.

Anyways, like any other fan of the Spice Girls, life had to go on. We were going out that Sunday and I just remembered the Spice Girls dominated the news and the music was being played. Eventually, I would come to my senses and move on myself. We didn’t have social media back a couple of years ago. The only way we saw news like that was the television or newspapers. That was it. That Monday was a school day and most of the girls that were older than me talked about it, but I should mention that there was other music that was hot during that year to. I would eventually grow out of the Spice Girls phase as I got older among the years, but would go back to listening to the Spice Girls as “guilty pleasure”. I did give the Spice Girls as a “Foursome” a chance, but it wasn’t the same without Ginger Spice.

In 2007, they would get back together for a reunion. At the time of it being announced, I didn’t care for it because I was listening to different genres of music as my focus was on the likes of Rob Zombie, 311 and other rock bands. I would try my best to get into it, but it wasn’t the passion I had for them before. When they performed at the closing ceremonies of the Olympics in 2012, I gave it a shot. While watching them, I saw my childhood flash in front of my eyes. The little girl inside of me was marking out while I saw the flashes of my childhood go in front of me. Even though they’ve got older, they’ve still kicked ass on stage and looked better when they did when they were younger.

Going back to the One Direction situation. Even though I do not listen to any of this new stuff that you hear today, and if this me in this situation of having One Direction go down to a “foursome”. I would give them a chance like I did with the Spice Girls, but eventually, you will grow out of their music and listen to something else. It could happen if you want to make that choice. I’m not controlling anyone to listen to any type of music. Not that any of these “fangirls” want to listen to a twenty-four year old that likes old school music.

Bottom line is this; cutting yourself over someone leaving a group isn’t worth it. Threatening others harm and saying that you are going to buy the band because one person left is not going to solve it neither. There should be other things that you should be worrying about like getting an education, going to college and staying out of trouble because doing these types of things are going to lead you from getting banned from the computer or worse.

So take my advice, cutting yourself, threatening others is not worth it. I hope this message gets out there to you “fansgirls” going crazy.

Thanks for Reading

By themeagang

Entry Eighteen: 2014: The year of happiness and pain.

It’s funny how a year can start off new and fresh, but within three days of the New Year. You made a decision that you want to take back, but you cannot seem to get it back. You realize something that you wanted the most, is stolen by a person that doesn’t deserve what that person currently has. You have the best summer of your life with doing the things that you wanted to do, but you never could do it before when younger. The summer was at best, but once the end of the year hits, the world comes crashing down. You finally get a job and make your own money, but only to realize that the person you lived with loses their job. You have your friends that you were close too at one point, but they move away and you see how much happiness they have now that they are without you. The holidays are coming up and it’s supposed to be “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” when really, it’s a year of depression and agony to even have a merry Christmas or a Happy Thanksgiving.

I know that this is the point of life and everything, but you just feel like there is something that you want to do. If I could turn back the clocks, I would fix everything and make it just right again. You feel like this is a nightmare and want to pretend it never happened, but in reality, this is the point of life and this is the facts of it. Sure some people don’t want to handle the truth about it and want to live in their world of happiness and the life they dreamt of and got something they “wanted” the most. Life is not about rainbows and cupcakes. Life sucks and then you die. I kind of wished CERTAIN people would think that because what I’m saying is the truth.

For the past three years since I’ve been looking back. The last positive year that I had and remembered was the beginning of 2008 where I had everything going good for me, but as soon as I had my nervous breakdown and things went downhill for me, and it lead me into a dark hole. I was able to get out of that dark hole and rebound, but I realized as soon as I was getting out of High School that I was becoming an adult. The fear of going to college and making good the good greats. Eventually I was looking back how far I’ve come, but I realized that the following years, some of them, with the exception of 2011 where I had the most fun until the winter of that year where I came down with an ear infection and started my spring semester recovering from it. The summer started off with a BANG as I made the Presidents List, but went downhill when my dog died and my brother was leaving to train for the army, but had to pull out because of a surgery. 2013 I wanted to different from the last year, but it started out with my Stepdad and myself fighting because I wasn’t working. The summer of that year was OK, but it ended up badly. 2014 I wanted to start off right, but every time something happened, it would hit a stop, but it would pick up when I did podcasts and became more friends with everyone. The summer as I said was the best, but it came to a stop. I started to pick up hours more at my job, but its starting to take a toll on me and this is my first job.

Yes, I know I sound like I’m bitching and moaning, but when you want to have a cry for help, you need to express it and do what you have to say here. They say that soldiers fall after they battled and lost a war. That’s what I feel like. I feel like a fought a battle and lost what I wanted. Then again, you can rise like a phoenix from the ashes that were burnt the following year. Well mark my words, everyone, there is something I want to share with you and I think that everything needs to see it and read it for myself.

2015, Meagan will rise from the ashes. I will get what I want the most and let nobody stop me from what I WANT to get the most. A lot of people know what this is and I will do whatever it takes to get what I want. I will have the fun I once had with my friends again and I will be working fully in 2015. 2015 will be the year my family gets back on their toes and will be the year that all will be right again. It’s the year of Redemption and it will be just as sweet as the San Antonio Spurs winning the title from the Miami Heat.

Let’s just hope I don’t jinx it…

Thanks for Reading.

By themeagang

Entry Seventeen: The Real Truth on why I didn’t like my prom; What could’ve been done

If some of you guys are on my Facebook page, I posted a status about my frustrations and my dislikes from prom. I tagged some people in the status because most of them knew what happened, most of my friends that are in the #HeelGrape group from twitter would know what would’ve been redone if I had it my way once again. Even though, my prom anniversary is coming up and it’s been five years, I look back and think about some of the things that would’ve been done and what the purpose of actually having fun would’ve been. My friend of nine years thought I had fun, but deep down inside, I didn’t. So welcome to my side of the shoot and welcome to my seventeenth edition of my personal blog where I will shoot everything I have to say regarding this.

Three months prior to the senior prom, my mom and I were talking about it actually and I discussed how I did not want to go because one being that I didn’t have someone to go with me and I asked her how would she afford everything. At the time, the economy sucked and money was tight in the house. I told my mom that she didn’t have to do anything and that for the sake of her, I won’t go, but my mom told me that she wanted to see me dressed up for the first time. The phone rang and it was my friend that called me up. We talked about the day and how everything went down. I remember in her tone of voice of excitement about prom and asking me if I was going. A little hesitant, I had to put my mom on speaker phone along with her as my friend discussed what places had prom dresses, in my size at the time. My mom, myself and her talked about it for at least thirty minutes until it was time to go as I would see her in the morning and in first period to talk about it more before I had to leave for Vo-Tech in the afternoon. My mom and I talked and said that the weekend that was coming up, would be the weekend that we would look at dresses. I was excited, but the pressure was on with my mom to see how she would pull this out for me to go.

Saturday came and I was really excited because we were getting ready to try on some dresses. I remember going into the store, rubbing my hands and saying that this was going to be good. We met up with a nice women and she was nice enough to allow us to try some dresses out. I wanted to go for a Beauty and the Beast look of Belle because Belle was my favorite character as well as picking out some colors as well to see what would go. The first one was a pink one that looked good on me, then it was a pink and white one that was OK before the yellow one which had to be the best looking one out of the both of them, but there was a problem. My boobs were lopsided and the dress couldn’t fit because of them. I was devastated and wanted to give up at the same time because it was something I wanted to wear, but I said to myself, “I want to go to prom and I will do everything to fit in a dress, even if my tits prevent me”. It was down to the last two that actually fit on me, the white/pink and the full pink one. My mom and I decided those were the last two that I needed to try on and that we would make our decision, the Saturday in two weeks because the following Saturday, I was heading to New York to see my dad that weekend.

The weekend with my dad had come and gone and it was another school week. I was antsy and dancing in my desk at Vo-Tech because the day was getting near of the final dress date. Finally the weekend had come and it was time for the final dress fitting. The weather was nice and the day was warm. I was so ready to try on the final dresses. My mom and I met with the same women that helped us two weeks prior and she remembered the dresses. Taking a look at the dresses, I decided that the pink and white one is my favorite, but my mom and the women said that the full pink one was the one to go with because it fit me better and it looked better. We had to make some arrangements on getting straps on because I didn’t want to go strapless with me hanging out. We got the shoes that we needed and plus, I was graduating in a couple of weeks, and I needed some type of shoes anyways. From there everything went smooth, until Memorial Day Weekend of the same year.

It was a couple of days till prom and my mom’s mini van had died in New Jersey because the fuel pump wouldn’t start to make the car start. We were screwed and had to call a tow truck to drive us back home to our state. I was shaking, crying and upset because a lot of things were coming up, my prom, my year book that I wanted to get, and so forth. I couldn’t even sleep and didn’t want to come to school the next day, but had to and on top of that, my bus driver that drove us to Vo-Tech each day, accidentally tapped a women who was on her iPod and didn’t see the bus coming and the cops had to interview me, my friend and someone else on the bus. Not a good way to start the week, but the end of the week was coming up fast and finals were coming up. The pressure was on for senior year and the prom as well.

So that horrible week past and it was time for prom coming up, I had to get through two finals on the same day because I finished Vo-Tech for good and it was time to take the final. I remember talking to someone who went to Vo-Tech with me right after we got done our finals. He was going to prom with his girlfriend and asked me if I was going with someone. I said no and I was going there just to be with some friends and have a good time. The bell rang and I didn’t have to come back to Upper Darby for after prom early Sunday Morning. Relieved that the week was over and done, but the fun started. I went to my mom to work to hang out with my Cheyney University Family that my mom works with. (They are my family because they saw my brother and I grow up and she is well liked there) I remember talking to one of the professors and how excited I was, but the weather was cold and damp. Perfect day to get things done. So right after my mom’s work, we went to my nail salon which is right down the street from me and got a well needed pedicure on my feet as well as getting my nails done and on top of that, my eyebrows waxed. Never in a million years have I got something on my face and let me tell you, it STUNG and HURT, but after doing it a couple of times which I have done, it doesn’t really hurt that much. You have to get used to it, but there was a downfall to this. My mom wasn’t going to have me get my hair done for the prom and that she was going to do it herself.

Prom Day Saturday, Promzilla comes out.

It was the day of the prom and I had to do some stuff around the house at first before I would do anything and I was talking to someone online like I always done for the past couple of years now. I showered, but the house was too hot and that my mom didn’t turn on the AC just yet. I was sweating already and it didn’t help. My hair dried up and she had to brush it out. Now I know I can allow hair cutters cut my hair because they know that they are doing, but my mom should NOT be allowed to brush or touch my hair. Since my hair was semi long at the time, she was YANKING the damn tangles out of my hair and was hurting me since they were already out, but she was still pulling at it. She then straightened my hair out and let me tell you, it was a mess right after because it became frizzy. We didn’t have anything to calm it down from ending up like that. I freaked out at my mother right after when I was up in her room and we argued about how messy I looked. In frustration, I looked at my prom dress and SLAMMED the whole entire thing right on the ground. I was pissed off and let out a scream. The whole day would’ve been spent and take some time going to freaking Hair Cuttery and doing my hair for the prom where someone could do an actually style to it because my hair is so thick. After I calmed down, I picked up the prom dress and slammed it on the railing to let my mom do the make up part. The phone rang and it was my friend, who asked if I was going to be jumping in the limo with them. I said no and I don’t want to be talked with right now and I will explain what was going on when I see her at the table as we hung up.

The time of me having to be at the prom was coming up and I wanted to persuade my mom that I was not feeling well and that I wanted to pull out the last-minute. Of course, that would be a selfish thing to do for me because my mom did a lot for this to me to go. I calmed down and finally put on the dress, along with the shoes and the crown, that I would eventually lose right after by mistake, but I think to this day that it was stolen because people were stealing a lot of stuff at prom now that I think of it. My mom was ready and she was taking pictures. On the outside, I was happy, but on the inside, I was not happy. I was hurting because I didn’t have someone to take the photos with me, but to add insult to injury, my stepdad HAD to come along for the ride. I did NOT want him to join my brother and I because during the time, my stepdad was really nagging and getting me really upset and if I didn’t do anything after high school, I would be kicked out and living on the streets, but now he sees some of the frustrations I’m going through right now, he leaves me alone and doesn’t bother me (though he really needs to stop with the snide comments as well). We arrived to Drexelbrook and I remember my mom telling me to have a good time and everything, but I told my mom I won’t and that I HATE THIS and never want to do this again and that the day was ruined. I was so mad that I didn’t want to be there. I wanted to turn around and run in the woods behind to me run away and to make matters worse I was bombarded by my class mates. I told them to leave me alone and that I did not want to be talked to. I was getting complemented on how I looked, but I didn’t accept it. I hated being there and I hated. There was a guy that was taking videos and asked me if I wanted to join in. I didn’t respond and my classmates were doing everything to cheer me up. After being annoyed, I told the guy that was doing the video to “FUCK OFF, and I didn’t need to be with people who I was NOT friends with.” Of course, he was afraid and didn’t even bother to ask if I was OK or not. It was time to finally go in and I walked slowly in. I was right after a couple of people to check in and my counselor saw me and had the biggest smile on her face, but she knew that I wasn’t happy. She asked if I was OK like she had done in the past, but I didn’t say a peep to her at all. I was trying my best not to cry as my throat was getting into knots. She said if I needed anything, she would be there.

So going into Drexelbrook, which as a nice place and reminds me of a palace, I went into the room where you had to get a photoshoot done with the pictures you had to pay for. I was trying to do a pose here and I knew it would be bad and it was bad. I thought it was horrible and added some more grief the day. I wanted to give up and spent my night either in the lobby or go home to say I was not feeling well, but I promised my friend that we would have a good time. After waiting for a while for my friend to show up, she and her boyfriend FINALLY came and I was relieved to see her. I explained what happened before and she told me, don’t worry about it at all and that this was a night dedicated to friends and the last time with people. I did have a “good time” with my friends, but I felt that it was not fun. The reason why I said “it was not fun” because most of the time, some songs that were really dirty came on and the ratchet side came up. I remember looking at the corner of my eye and seeing someone literally dry humping a someone else’s date which had me grossed the hell out. Seriously? But then again, I expected it and the back of the crowd was worse because they were grinding up on walls and humping each other in the back. Pathetic if you asked me, but the night was better as a saw a former teacher of mine, who I was talking to that night and we were talking about my brother as he had him and told me that he was a pleasure to teach and remind him of me in a way. We joked around about the Phillies and Yankees and if one day, the Phillies and Yankees were to play in the World Series (That did come true and the Yankees did win their World Series, VICTORY!). We got a picture with each other and the girl that he was with was really rude towards me when I didn’t even say a word to her besides a simple, hello, but that didn’t bother me. The slow dances were really tough to watch because I didn’t have a partner to dance with and seeing some of the people out there, did break my heart because I was alone and didn’t have someone to dance with. Finally, prom as over and done with (THANK GOD) and it was time to go to after prom. I went shoeless because my feet were killing me and I was so glad to put on a pair of SHOES that I was comfortable in. Getting out of Drexelbrook was a hassle, but within five minutes, we got out and it was on the way to Upper Darby for the after-prom. I checked in again like I had to before and it was time for me to get changed out of the dress that I was wearing into something that was more decent looking to have as well. I think that it was a good for me to change into something and plus, I was hungry on top of that with pizza and sodas. My type of stuff that I would like to eat. However, I was starting to feel tired. I had to find a place to sleep until after prom was over and done with. I went into the quiet room where movies were playing and wanted laid down. Suddenly, without knowing, I fell asleep and I was in a deep sleep until my friend and her boyfriend shook me and told me that they couldn’t find me for a bit and that my stuff was out and had it been stolen, I would’ve freaked. A couple of hours nap was good, but I was still tired and needed to sleep. As Afterprom was finally winding down, I hitched a ride back with my friends family back home. I was really happy that I was finally home. I told my mom I was home and that I was getting my PJS on and needed to sleep. I was happy that I was home and in my pajamas and as soon as I hit that pillow, I was out and I needed sleep, until I was woken up at 10:00 in the morning due to loud noises my mom and brother were saying and plus, I had to look for my damn crown that wasn’t a big deal or anything.

So truth be told here, I didn’t have fun at the prom. The fact that I was with my friends the whole night was good and I did have fun with them, but the nature of what I saw and the fact that I was bombarded with stuff around me and hassle with everything made it. Even though I did have fun with my friends, it would’ve been fun if I had someone with me and share the night with on top of that. I look five years later and see all these interesting proposals to have celebrities or sports figures to go to prom. They sing, make signs or do anything to have them go. Now, a lot of you may know that I have a big **liking** on Minnesota Twins Pitcher and you see him in my twitter profile and header as well, named Phil Hughes (Who played on the Yankees for a while until switching teams for the first time, INFACT, I actually did a podcast on wishing him luck and that I will support him. My #Heelgrape Ride or Die chick, Janet sent the actually link to him because I was shy on sending it to him and surprisingly, he responded to it which I’m generous for). Had I know five years ago, I would’ve done something like that and wrote to the Yankees Organization for Phil to come to my prom, I would’ve been the star of the night, but then again, for the sake of Phil and having Upper Darby’s jocks and preps that I couldn’t stand, it was the right idea to NOT write to the Yankees and have that happen.

Now it’s five years later and I would do anything to redo my prom. First thing is first, since my hair is a little bit shorter and actually with color this time around. I will have it rightfully done the right way and fix the color up that I have now so my brown roots won’t show. I would bring one of my good heel grape friends, Corrin to come along and have her go with a Minnesota Twin as well so she won’t feel alone. The dress I would wear is this.

I think I would look well and of course, have Phil be my date for the night. That’s what I would do to redo my prom and make it less ratchet than my 2009 prom was back then and heck, maybe have a television camera follow me around to show all the people who had a disaster prom, that they can redo their prom the right way if they were alone or felt it was not good enough for them. Even though something like that might not happen. I can still dream right?

To close out my blog, I am going to be posting some of my personal prom photos that were taken here as well as that prom photoshoot I did.

(before I did)


(Me and my friend, Laura)

(My Prom photoshoot pic)

Thanks for reading.

By themeagang

Entry Sixteen: The Upper Darby Downfall.

What is this which morning sunlight,
Gilds with golden beams?
‘Tis our Upper Darby High School,
Castle of our dreams.
Raise the chorus, keep it ringing,
Loud her praises tell.
Hail to thee, beloved High School.
Hail to thee, all hail!

Everyone that attended Upper Darby High School or is currently attending that school should know that is the Alma Mater that is sung at every graduation. Looking at the lyrics of the song, one of the lyrics stand out to me and that is the Castle of Our Dreams. Is Upper Darby REALLY the Castle of Dreams or is it the Castle of Hell? The reason why I’m writing this blog is to so my disgust on the fact that the school that has the best programs with music and the arts, has the negativity coming in the school and becoming on the news that makes every Upper Darby Alumni shaking their heads at the fact that a good school is getting such a bad reputation for what is going on.

I graduated from Upper Darby High School in the class of 2009 where back then, there was nothing negative to report. I can say that my time throughout the High School was a up one and a down one at the same time, but you RARELY saw anything like this on the news. Nine times out of ten, it was positive stuff that was going on and that was it. No negativity or anything. As soon as I left Upper Darby High, the negative side started to roll and here is a perfect example of the start of the negative effect in Upper Darby.


If you regard that article, it started out as a friendly chant until Lower Merion started to get a little rowdy with their chants and yes, Upper Darby has many names that the list is long to go on, but did they really have to go that far of chanting that type of stuff? You learn about what went down during those horrible times of the Jewish People and how they were burnt up because they were Jewish. Makes me sick to think about it and I expressed my anger towards this back in 2009 because I am part Jewish. Sicken at the same time to even think about it.

While the following years were quiet and you really haven’t heard anything about Upper Darby in the past news prior, but in the Winter of 2011, this case went down along with a couple of other headlines that went down. Here is what happened during that year.


I should say that this made National Media everywhere and it made me sick to even hear about this situation. As some of you may have know that I have been bullied and I always speak about bullying and my experiences being the victim of it, but it made me sick to even hear about it. The kid that was bullied got justice for it, but his bullies did not as they’ve got arrested and I don’t know about their sentence, but I am glad it happened because someone was finally making a stand to bullying.

Now we go something funny and it did not involve anyone from Upper Darby, it was more of a WTF moment that went down and I am sure a lot of you guys remember this situation.


I was on Spring Break and infact, this was my last day of Spring Break and a little before I went to Monday Night Raw that Monday. I was doing my homework and getting ready to finish something up until my brother posted something on Facebook about naked people running around. I really thought this was a joke, but it was not as I looked at this and said to my mom when I called her up. I was like this is some real stuff that is going on here as she was laughing until I said that was not funny and allowed my brother to explain what happened. Needless to say it was something that was shocking and crazy at the same time.

I am going to fast forward to this year to an incident that really got my pissed off early this year and that was kids, as young as SEVEN cursing out a bus driver’s aid and how the language was going down. At their age at one point, I would never use that type of language to curse someone out like that or my butt would have been smacked. It was sickening to watch and it was sickening to even see the video of these kids cursing out someone that is making sure they get home from school safe and sound. Moving forward a little bit, I am going to talk about a statement I said to my mom prior towards the school year this year. I said to my mom, “How much you want to bet that Upper Darby is on the news this year A LOT for something stupid?” My mom said hopefully not a lot as she said to me, but guess how many incidents their have been so far this year.


Early this year, some kid brought A LOT of heroin to school this year in a school bag and was arrested for it which lead to a wild chase and leading to a officer that helped me when I got robbed last year, breaking his ankle (I really hope that he is OK as well or making a speedy recovery). The question I had was “Where the hell is this kid getting these types of drugs” Needless to say that this made the new super attendant very upset because he lost a son to a drug overdose from this drug. For the sake of the kid that got caught with this, I hope he learns his lesson and gets help he needs. Heroin is a drug you don’t want to fuck with (I’d never tried it, but I remember a story back in Human Behavior Class where a guest speaker spoke with us about drugs and alcohol and how it messed up his life, but he got clean along the way)

Now I am going to go to today and that is the incident that happened two days right after my birthday and here is the article below for you to read.


This is where I draw the line. All because two “gangs” were having trouble with each other, does not give you the right to have a freaking Royal Rumble match during Lunch at School. If you have a problem with someone, the best way to have it out is to talk it out with someone and what’s sick about this even more is that a teacher, someone that is there to work and to educate these kids for a successful school career, gets hurt in the process with him getting a concussion and tearing ligaments in his knee. From what I’ve read, six were charged in this situation, but I really think that they should be expelled for what they’ve done in this and I really hope the teacher is OK what was done. You don’t do that type of shit to someone and you sure as hell don’t act like a Zoo Animal on top of that as well. Sickening.

So this is where I conclude with my blog here about this whole situation. Michael Chitwood said the goal is to protect the kids that go here, but I really ask this situation. How are you going to protect them? Last Thursday, I asked my friend’s cousin who attends Upper Darby how is the school now and she said it’s really got worse over the course when my brother and I left the school. The teachers have to use cellphones in case of an emergency and have to lock the doors. I honestly think that more security should be put in the school as well has having metal detectors when you first walk in the door. God forbid if there is a tragedy (which I don’t want to say jinx here) that goes down, it would make the situation worse. Another thing I should state is the Upper Darby School board having an open forum on these problems. I am sure that most of the alumni have no problem speaking out and I have no problem expressing my voice to them and how I feel.

Finally, I should say that I know there are good people in that school, but with the negativity that goes on, it takes away from the school. I already predicted that the worse is yet to come in the year 2015, but this is just the beginning of what is worse to come and I’m sure that there is going to be a lot more disappointment throughout the years here in Upper Darby.

Thanks for Reading.

By themeagang

Entry Fifteen: 23 Years of Beauty and Personality

In five days from now, I turn twenty years old. I am glad to be alive this long and I’m very blessed to be living this long on this crazy world we are living in right now, but tonight, I’ve decided to write a blog about something regarding me and yes, it maybe a little bit…dull and boring to some of you guys that might read this, but I want write about something that I wanted to talk about for the longest time and that my personality and my beauty that I wanted to write about here. Some it maybe sad and some of it maybe a slap in the head worthy, but here we go with the talking of this blog. Get ready.

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(Me Circa 2000, fishing)

When I was young, a lot of people thought I would be the one that was going to be the pretty looking girl in school. Back when I went to Coolbaugh Elementary School, I was considered to be one of the popular people and everyone was my friend in school. They would see me as someone that would go far and actually get a boyfriend first. I remember one of my old friends back up there saying that I would get a boyfriend because people liked me for who I was and thought I was nice. Even though my time up in the Poconos was done, I was going to keep that image of being the nice looking kid that was going to a new place. Turns out that I was wrong and it would begin a life and a struggle.

I went through a major personality change back when I went to Westbrook Park, I went from someone that was told that she would be nice and get that first before to someone that was called ugly and was never going to have a nice boyfriend in life. Even though I did like someone on the first block I moved to down there and actually kissed him…on the cheek which caused a friction with some of the kids in school leading to the thought that I actually had sex with the boy kissed on the cheek (Apparently kissing someone on the cheek leads to sex down in the minds of these boys where I live, but there is no way, I did that type of stuff at being ten years old at the time). From there, I would live in a shell of bullying and having that personality of fear. Fear of what I was going through and the fear of being pushed behind. There were some days I would try putting on makeup such as eye shadow because a lot of the girls were doing that type of stuff. Turns out that it wouldn’t end up that way and I would go to school, still being called Ugly and it went on throughout my years of being in fifth grade, but the following year, sixth grade, I thought this would be the year of me coming out of my shell, but it wasn’t.

(Me circa 2002, holy afro hair)

In sixth grade, I tried some many options of me being a different person and tried to shed the look of me being that girl who was known for being that ugly ducking, but turns out it was worse. I was going through the stage of becoming a women and thinking that I didn’t want to grow up and to the men that might read this blog, I apologize for this, but it’s a known fact just incase you guys have a daughter one day. During school, I felt like I peed myself in my English class and I had to ask my teacher to go to one of these classes. I did and I found that I got my first period. Being dumb founded and lost. I cried because I found out that I was going through that stage and I didn’t want it to happen. My body was changing and I remember crying in the nurses’ office that my mom had to cradle me because it was scary. I realized that my body was changing and I realized that I need to take action. Another false and stupid rumor: I was told I would take showers once a week. That was a bad call and would turn everything off for a couple of years regarding me. Lovely.

(Me circa 2004; beginning of beauty)

When I started the 8th grade, I needed a change and I needed a change quick. Over the course of me being in 7th grade, I was the one that was coming out of the shell a little bit and I was the one that needed to decide what I wanted to do. High School was coming up and High School was quickly right behind us when it came to the moment of getting close. The school year was long and dragged, it was a year of ups and down and it was a year of turning into a young women and growing up at the same time. I remember in the beginning of 2005, I changed something regarding me and I changed my personality of being that shy one, the one that feared of her life of bullying and the one that feared that she was not going to get that someone one day. I kept my guard up the whole entire time and I didn’t want to expand my feelings of being someone that would express her feelings to someone that she liked, even though I had some random person that would harass me for the past couple of weeks and hug me randomly out of nowhere at lunch, but the guys in 8th grade were dicks and I let them know when I opened my mouth. That’s where I got the “Take no Shit” attitude from and I guess I had that attitude all the time that went with me to the end of Middle School.

However, in Middle School at the end of eighth grade, there was something that was called the dinner dance and all of the girls that were in eighth grade all went to this dance with the exception of me because I was going to my dad’s house at the time and let’s be honest here, going to New York was WAY better then being picked on and judged for what you went throughout the years of Middle School, but it something that I would soon regret as well with seeing all of the people move to High School and move on in their lives, but for me, High School was just something I would look forward to and not care about anything that went on. In the start of Ninth Grade, I would still be a little nervous, but throughout the time, I got some friends along the way and a lot of people would talk to me as well. The people from Middle School, that once thought I was not cool enough, were talking to me and saw that I was just a cool person that would like to help people out, but on the down side, there was bullying still and I would still be harassed. A fuse would light up inside me and I had enough, thank god nobody was around, so I decided to shove someone into a locker because I was sick and tired people judging me for who I was and what I did. I was feared and when people knew that I was walking in the halls, they would take a step back because they knew I was coming.

I know I haven’t covered this part, but I am going to go back to the first time I’ve talked about and that was me getting a boyfriend. In my Language Arts class, I had a crush on someone that I will keep anonymous because his name is not worthy enough to bring him up in my blog here, but this would come back later on in the blog so read that part. I had a crush on him and I expressed going out with him, but this is where the judging part came in. He would tell me to wear certain clothes, he would tell me to wear makeup and he would tell me that I would have to do what he wanted to do. Infact, I would give him my house number because I didn’t have a phone at the time, but it makes me wonder what would happen. Everyone in High School was beginning to have reckless sex and getting pregnant. My instinct came in and thank god it didn’t go further. Skipping a little bit to the break up right after Thanksgiving break, I broke up with him, stood my ground against him and put an end to that, but it would be hard for me getting a boyfriend because of the way it happen and from there, I would be labeled, Crazy Meagan because I was crazy…in a so called “bad” way.

(Me Circa 2007; Nice day in the Bronx with my dad)

Yes, I’m a little crazy, but over the time in my tenth grade year and my 11th grade year, I was coming out of my shell a little bit more as I would be talking to older students as well as people thought I was the one that would be cool to talk with and someone that likes to give advice. However, this is where the down side came in. During my times as being a sophomore and junior year, I would pretend to be someone I was not. I made an invisible boyfriend up because I felt it was cool enough to have one and thought it was time to move up with the older people and everyone thought I would be popular as well. Boy, did it not only cost me my friendship with some people, it made me lose my mind and it made me fall into a deep depression where I turned to food to help me out here with it. Sure food is good and yummy at the same time, but it made me gain some weight and it made me even lose my mind more. I would always talk to a teacher almost everyday by coming into his grade room, but I really think I was in need of someone to talk to, but I didn’t know how to express my problems as well. People would say that I had a nervous break down as soon as I left Vo-Tech and having the stress of shit piling up in junior year, but it was a break down. I would shave my eyebrows because I felt like I needed to express myself. Thank god, I was not committed into an insane asylum. I just needed the air to breathe in.

In the summer of 2008, I got my thoughts together, but I was realizing something that my high school career was about to end and I needed to think about something really fast. I was to go to college or not to go to college, but something went in my mind. If I was to not go to college, I would feel the wrath of my stepdad about me sitting down and not doing anything, but if I did go to college, I would have something on my mind and I would have something to say about this and do it to get that degree. The year 2008 was rough, but it was a sign of a change. In 2008, the Phillies (barf) won the World Series, I was being harassed because of my hardcore hatred and it made people hate me. What did I want? I wanted to people feel that way about me because they knew I had a piece of mind. I made a full on heel turn in Senior year and I didn’t care about it. I was obnoxious and I said that the Yankees would win the following year (in which they did) and I proved myself about that, but prior towards that, it was prom season and I was a little iffy about going to prom that year, but thanks to my friend of eight years, Laura and her telling to go. I had to ask my mom, who was rough on money at the time to help out. We did and we got the dress for me to go to prom, but the only thing that was not done, was my hair which was a bum mess. Here are some photos of how nice my hair was for my High School Graduation and the mess compared to prom and then I will go to now.

Holy hair batman in the first one, but look how nice in the second.

(Me with my straight weave, and new glasses 2013)

As I finish this blog, I look at the twenty-three reasons why a guy like there should end up with someone like me. I can say that I’m smart, funny, caring, a sports fanatic, an animal lover, a talker, a nerd when it comes to video games and some other stuff. I can find that guy one day that would go about that stuff and I hope that it can happen one of these days. Twenty Three is a good number for me, but could it be the lucky one?

Thanks for Reading

By themeagang

Entry Thirteen: The Hobby I love doing, Efeding.

So a lot of you that read this blog always see what I do on here. It’s either talking about bullying, talking about my process of finding a job or frustrations on what I feel like I need to vent about, but there is something that I want to share and that is something I like to do when I am bored because I really don’t have that much people to hang out with or during my free time and that is Efeding. Now a lot of you don’t know what an Efed is or know what the hell it is, so, here is a definition on what an efed is so I know you’re on the right track on what I am talking about.


So that is a good example of what an E-Fed is. Now here is my story on how I got into Efeding on the net today.

Back in 2004, I was originally going to start doing it because I was hearing a lot of stuff from a friend of mine about it, but due to circumstances at the time with me being a dumb teenager and many other reasons, I was not allowed on the computer for nearly a year, which pushed it back till the following year, 2005 where I started E-Feding at a friends place where I had no clue what the hell at the time I was doing leading to the point where I talked with a couple of friends of mine and we started our own. Sure it was a little rocky at some points and my writing at the time was SHIT meaning it was not good. I was playing a character I did not know what was the difference between a heel and a face and that I was always flip flopping with characters which I didn’t have a clue how to run, but in 2006, I was starting to get a little bit better, but with me not knowing what to do still, I was in trouble, especially going on a year into this. Then one of my friends left who my co runner which lead to another friend of mine was helping me out and still to this day, he helps me out. Sure it was still rocky, but I was getting the hang of it. Then I decided it was time to move on to expand myself, but this one, is a long story.

It was an Underground E-Fed. I thought it was a good idea to join it, but let me tell you something, that September when I joined, I did not know what the hell I was going into the day I joined the fed. Here I was, my character being a sweet and innocent girl going against tough bitches that were all about blood and all that crazy stuff. They were crazy and it was crazy being there to the point where half of the time, I wanted to quit. I finally ended up eventually being a champion there, but I felt it I didn’t deserve to be the champion. I was still new and didn’t have a damn clue on what I was doing and eventually, one of my characters were called the “worst in ring skill” twice in 2007 which I felt like 2007 was my improving year, but compared to 2006, I felt like it was a Big Fuck you to me because I was finally improving at the stuff I was doing. My writing skills jumped up from being shit and I was finally getting the whole thing thanks to one of my best friends, who I call a brother and he is my chedda brother from another mother (Have to keep it civil right there because I don’t want be called a racist or anything like that), but he was the one that saw something in me. He was the one that saw that I was the one that could do it. While taking his advice, I became one of the best Underground Efeders in the history of that company moved on to take my dominance to a new Efed Company where I proved a lot of people wrong. Even though Underground Efeding seems to be apart of my closed chapter now and I accomplished a lot there. There is another book that is still opened.

While still looking beyond past my efed and doing some Underground Feding, I joined my friends REAL wrestlers Efed and let me tell you, I did not have a damn clue on how to play an actual wrestler until I was finally getting the hang out it later that year in 2008, but that fed would eventually close and I would move onto a different fed, which is still open to this day and let me tell you, I was very bad there, but over the time, I was finally getting it and getting it to the point where I *won* a tag team championship, but that would start over and I was actually handed the title. I would rather have been fighting for one instead of one just being handed over. I’ve played a lot of characters there, but I felt like it wasn’t good enough for the people at that fed to finally become Women’s Champion and one top of the company once and for all. I had that chance against my Spanish tutor for the Women’s Champion not once, but twice, but when she left the efed, I spoke up to the staff and said that they had ever opportunity to become the Women’s Champion with Angelina Love, who I was playing at the time, why wouldn’t you guys make the decision and put me as the champion? With unanswers with that one, we started over and again, I am on a mission to become the Women’s Champion with one character that I am a big fan of and have her in one of my favorite “ship” fed couples as me and my friend are wanting to become on top. I want it for not only the both of us, but to prove that I paid my dues here and that I am going to be remembered for something that I have done in that fed and that was becoming the most improved to a well respected person in the fed that knew what I was doing. I know it sounds corny, but I think I should be on top. If I was on top in many feds, then what is stopping me from becoming on top there? I don’t want to sound like a brat or anything, but I think its time.

As I look back on the past with me coming in as a fourteen and a half year old high schooler that was shit at writing and didn’t know a damn thing what I was doing to someone that is now twenty two, a college graduate, has a love for writing and many other stuff that I like to do. I asked myself how much gas do I have in the tank left for this and you know when its time to go, its time to go and move on. I said that 2015, my tenth year was it so I could move on. I am now an adult, not a dumb teenager anymore. While this is a hobby, a hobby dies once in a while and it’s now time to find a new one once the time comes.

Thanks for Reading.

By themeagang